Tsibog Tuesdays: Hot Sauce

There are a lot of ways to prove one's manliness. Bench pressing thrice your weight, wrestling wild animals, jumping away form explosions and the like. Then there are the actual do-able ones like manning up to that insane sauce wreaking havoc in your mouth. Yum!

If anything in this world has been THE standard for manly condiments, it has been the bottled awesomeness of hot sauce. Second is gravy. Nothing shows everyone that you're a man like taking what is basically liquid pain with your food. Hot sauce is also the only condiment to turn eating in to a competition of pride among men.

Its good to stay humble and stick with the regular Tabasco but are we not men? Don't we push things insanely beyond their limits to the point of sheer stupidity?

Enter Dave's insanity

paPOW! The run of the mill Tabasco that we all know and love sits at around 1,500-2,500 Scoville units, a measurement for spiciness. Yes. Theres science. Science everywhere. Dave's insanity packs 180,000 Scoville units. Now this is not THE hottest hot sauce out there but come on. There's a warning on the bottle saying how this hot sauce may cause miscarriages for pregnant women. This hot sauce is so hot it can KILL BABIES!!

I know this is getting insane but bear with me. It gets HOTTER and DUMBER and well frankly MORE AWESOMER!!

Can you guess how many Scoville units this little bastard packs?

300,000?

No way.

1,000,000,000?

Dude, not even.

Try 16,000,000,000. Its so intense that it only comes in the form of a few crystals. Crystallized death if you ask me. If you're unlucky enough to be at the receiving end of this bad boy you would need AT LEAST 250,000 gallons of water to wash it down. So yeah, you would sooner drown than kill the fire in your mouth. Its like Satan's piss.

For a more modest and sensible choice, meaning flavor over heat, may I suggest Sriracha hot sauce you can buy in most Vietnamese stores or restaurants. The stuff goes with anything except for maybe open wounds or other bodily orifices.

ALSO! Taco Pizza out of nowhere!

Tsibog Tuesdays: Value Meal in a Pizza

We Mansters know that in every food purchase, this is always a given: Value-for-money comes as first or second priority. However, though it is important to economize, the reality is that sadly only a few food establishments are able to meet this demand. You know this is true when you are hardly satisfied with the actual serving size versus the one you see on their menus.

Poor tummy, must be hard to satisfy.

Well there is something that you can do. The guys from Alligator-sunglasses.com shared this one-of-a-kind recipe that you can do in the comfort of your home. Best of all, there's no denying that with this kind of recipe, you get what you deserve, without hurting your wallet.

Behold, the Value Meal in a Pizza:

Photo Credit:

http://alligator-sunglasses.com/post/765986739/america-fuck-yeah-food-edition

Tsibog Tuesdays: Fugu

I guess Fugu (also called Pufferfish and Blowfish) must be included in the list of foods men should eat. It is eaten raw and it poses danger to those who eat it because it is poisonous when not prepared properly. According to Wikipedia, if poisoned with Tetrodoxin (the toxin found in Pufferfish), a man can die in 24 hours. There is no antidote yet for this poison.

I first learned about Fugu in an episode of CSI: New York. In that episode, a woman was killed by Fugu poisoning. I do not watch CSI regularly but that episode caught my attention because I like sushi and the way the restaurant serves it is very interesting.

(The sushi restaurant appears at 1:59)

This Japanese delicacy requires 7 years of training which is quite reasonable since a mistake in preparation could cost the life of the customer or even the life of chef too. As you will see in the next video, the chef must have dexterity and agility in using the knife. Chefs need to cut the fish fast to prevent the spread of poison in its body. The chef also wears a thick glove in his right hand to protect him from poison and bites.

The only downside of eating Fugu is that there are only few chefs who are licensed to prepare it which makes it expensive and rare (If we were to believe CSI, one order of Fugu costs $500). In my research, I found only one restaurant in Metro Manila that serves Fugu. According to this site, the Japanese restaurant called Taka has it. Taka is located at Arnaiz Avenue. If you know any other restaurant in Manila that serves this, leave a comment.

Now, how do you spell raw?

Photo credit:

http://www.japanprobe.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/05/fugu.jpg

Tsibog Tuesdays: Dahil Kulang Ang Isa

Double Feature for this week, kaya naman, ano ba ang double sa kinakain ng mga kalalakihan?

Lets face the facts, malakas kumain ang mga lalaki. Kulang para sa atin kung walang extra on the side. Hindi pwede ang isang ulam lang, isang cup ng kanin o isang serving lang ng gravy! dapat laging double! May Extra Rice at Double Yolk Egg.

Pero Parang awa niyo na HUWAG NA HUWAG niyo gagawin ito!

Mukha bang tama yan!?!

Hindi lahat ng bagay, pwedeng double..

Tsibog Tuesdays: Crazy big Kitkat bar

You think you're a big man finishing packs of chocolate at a time? Oh seven packs you say? Im sorry but your stories of chocolate conquest are nothing in comparison to this monster of a chocolate bar. Ba-BAM!

It even comes with instructions although it is in no way advisable that you do something this insane. Then again, that WOULD be a funny failure. In that case, god speed.

Tsibog Tuesdays: Xocolat High

I know what you're thinking. Why the hell are they writing about a place that sells cakes and stuff? Isn't that a bit gay? Well, no, my friend. If you did your homework, you would know that 84% of their customers are female. Yes. FEMALE.

The little place that looks like a 70s house near Dormitoryana and Bo's in Katipunan is Xocolat. It serves great food, and would actually get you more relaxed and energized after hanging out there, because of there nice couch, old wooden chairs, the sound of the rustling of the leaves, and the homey atmosphere

Xocolat is actually the place to be, if you like want to take someone out, talk, relax, and enjoy each other's company. Or you can go there just to do girl watching, while eating cake, which the Manster staff rarely do. Rarely.

Anyway, onto the cakes. Well, one thing is that, all their cakes are like heaven. Soft, moist, and chewy. And yes, chocolatey. I won't recommend anything, cause everything's delightful already.Also, try their hot choco drinks. I've heard they're really delicious.

The only thing that might bother you is that their service is a little bit slow. Parang nasa bahay lang talaga sila. But it might work to your advantage whenever you're on a date, since you get to be with her(or him, whatever.) longer right?

Xocolat isnt just in Katipunan. They also have several branches around the metro, so you wouldnt have to go through the Katipunan traffic just to eat some of those chocolate cakes.

Heres a list of their branches.

- Lobby, Promenade Greenhills Shopping Center

- 2nd Level Bldg A, SM Megamall

- Center Courtyard, Eastwood City Walk 2

- 172 B-Gonzales St. Loyola Heights

P.S. This isnt a paid advertisement, but we really hope it was. Haha. And the stat above was made up, but really, most of their customers are women.

Tsibog Tuesdays: Cocina Juan

It’s a safe bet that many Filipinos have yet to encounter that genuine Central American flavor in their foods. So when siblings Thomas, Juan, and Karlo Adviento decided to introduce an exotic food experience to Pinoys, one just can’t help but take notice and visit their restaurant. Located at 100 Maginhawa Street, UP Teacher’s Village in Quezon City, Cocina Juan is a restaurant that is highly influenced by the flavors of different regions of Central America, hence the tagline “Inspiracion de Centro America, Plato para La Pilipino.” The restaurant easily becomes a favorite among college students and young professionals with its student-friendly prices and unique Hispanic ambiance.

The restaurant specializes in grilled meat and Tex-Mex dishes. Other favorites include:

Try dining at Cocina Juan and you'll find it very sulit (worth it)! Not only are the dishes impressive, but the overall experience is beyond compare. This restaurant is the perfect place to satisfy that manly appetite of yours.

Address: 100 Maginhawa Street, UP Teacher's Village Quezon City

Contact Details:

Telephone Number: +632434 3911

Email: cocina.juan@hotmail.com

Photo credit: http://www.myfoodtrip.com/v/218681/cocina_juan.htm